20 Days until Christmas!
We did a bit more Christmas shopping today. However, we still have so many gifts to buy... it's ridiculous. Although I love having a big family, it's a pain during Christmas time because it's like 100 presents later and you're still not close to being done! lol Oh well. It would help, though, if my mother would get back to me about what my youngest sister and brother want this year. They're still young enough that their interests change about every 5 milli-seconds! Unfortunately, it's going to be hard to get any shopping done the next few weekends because we have the man's son next weekend and the weekend after that we're going to visit his mom to celebrate her birthday with the family. So, I have a distinct feeling that the week before Christmas is going to be full of shopping and running around like chickens with our heads cut off! lol
Right now, I am waiting on my laundry to finish up and then I'm going to take a shower... so I'm going to leave it here for the night.
<3 Jade
Sunday, December 5, 2010
Saturday, December 4, 2010
A Little Here and a Little There
21 Days until Christmas!
So, we did just a bit of Christmas shopping tonight. It's depressing, really... looking at prices and having to scrutinize every little thing in order to decide what to buy and what not to buy because you're so broke that you can literally see the black hole that was once your bank account. /sigh
But anywho... at least we have a few things picked up now. And maybe we'll hit up a few more stores tomorrow. We can't spend too much, though, until I get my next paycheck and even then it's going to be tight. It is what it is and I can't change it. I'm just doing the best I can with what we have and I'm learning to be ok with it because it WILL eventually change... once I graduate! lol
For now, I think I'm going to go chill out and read and eventually pass out.
<3 Jade
So, we did just a bit of Christmas shopping tonight. It's depressing, really... looking at prices and having to scrutinize every little thing in order to decide what to buy and what not to buy because you're so broke that you can literally see the black hole that was once your bank account. /sigh
But anywho... at least we have a few things picked up now. And maybe we'll hit up a few more stores tomorrow. We can't spend too much, though, until I get my next paycheck and even then it's going to be tight. It is what it is and I can't change it. I'm just doing the best I can with what we have and I'm learning to be ok with it because it WILL eventually change... once I graduate! lol
For now, I think I'm going to go chill out and read and eventually pass out.
<3 Jade
Friday, December 3, 2010
Proud of Me
22 Days until Christmas!
I am quite proud of myself tonight. I finished almost all of my homework (except for 1 thing, but I can't do that until the document is emailed to me) AND my paperwork! :-D YAY for a relatively homework/work-free weekend!
I don't know what I'm going to do with myself. I'm going to actually have time to relax this weekend... it's going to be so freaking weird. AND we don't have the kid... so it's not like I'm going to be bombarded with 100 questions every 30 seconds! lol
Perhaps I will actually feel rested at the end of this weekend instead of completely and utterly exhausted! Only 2 more weeks until the semester is over... I can't believe how quickly everything is flying by right now. I only have like 4 months until graduation and I will have my MSW... it seems like I've barely graduated from college. Damn... I AM educated! lol
There's so much I could say right now, but I'm going to end this on a cheerful note (instead of a somewhat gloomy and depressing one). Perhaps next time...
<3 Jade
I am quite proud of myself tonight. I finished almost all of my homework (except for 1 thing, but I can't do that until the document is emailed to me) AND my paperwork! :-D YAY for a relatively homework/work-free weekend!
I don't know what I'm going to do with myself. I'm going to actually have time to relax this weekend... it's going to be so freaking weird. AND we don't have the kid... so it's not like I'm going to be bombarded with 100 questions every 30 seconds! lol
Perhaps I will actually feel rested at the end of this weekend instead of completely and utterly exhausted! Only 2 more weeks until the semester is over... I can't believe how quickly everything is flying by right now. I only have like 4 months until graduation and I will have my MSW... it seems like I've barely graduated from college. Damn... I AM educated! lol
There's so much I could say right now, but I'm going to end this on a cheerful note (instead of a somewhat gloomy and depressing one). Perhaps next time...
<3 Jade
Thursday, December 2, 2010
Nothing to Say
23 Days until Christmas!
So, I really have nothing to say today... so this shall be my blog for the night.
Pathetic, really.
<3 Jade
So, I really have nothing to say today... so this shall be my blog for the night.
Pathetic, really.
<3 Jade
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
A Thought-Provoking Event
24 Days til Christmas
It is my goal this month to post a new blog every day until Christmas. Why am I making this my goal, you may be asking yourself. Well, I've decided that I have been much happier since I started blogging (more regularly) again and getting all of my thoughts and feelings out of my head and into something tangible I can understand. Plus, it makes for a nice little countdown of the days until Christmas (which I look forward to every year... even though we're broke and really can't afford Christmas presents for anybody this year).
So, anywho... onto the topic of tonight's blog...
For those who don't know, I have a part-time job in retail. So, Black Friday being the biggest shopping day of the year, I had to work a 12 hour shift (3 a.m. until 3 p.m.) at my store. Well, I was at the jewelry counter, which just so happens to be right by the main door, when I see these people walk in that were stereotypically "gothed" out in their choice of clothes. The girls were in corset-style tops and extremely short, school-girl style plaid skirts (like, short enough to see their butt cheeks hanging out from the bottom of the skirts) and the guys were in baggy black pants with chains. But the most noticeable was the black studded leashes attached to the collars around the guys' necks that lead into the girls' hands (yes, we're talking the atypically seen male subs and female Dommes). The one guy had his hands handcuffed behind his back and then cuffed to the back belt loop of his pants. The other guy, although he had handcuffs around his wrist, had his hands free and hanging down by his side. Then, when they girls were paying for their stuff, the guys knelt on the floor by the register until they were done. Once the transaction was completed, the girls tugged on the leashes and said "Up. Come." and the guys did... and followed them out of the store.
Of course, this became a major hot-topic during the entire day of Black Friday among all of the employees. A lot of people thought it was done on a dare (because, really, there are people out there that would do something like that just in order to get a reaction out of people), but I can't see it being a dare because the couples were in their 30's-ish. If they had been 18-19 year olds, I could have seen it... but not at the age of 30 or so.
Personally, I don't give a flying fuck what type of lifestyle people want to live (duh). However, this event really disturbed a lot of people at work. A lot of my co-workers that are my age had the attitude of "live how you want, just don't bring it here," but a lot of the older ones were just downright disgusted by it. And honestly, I can see the point-of-view of both groups of people. After I was done working, I had a brief conversation with the man about this, and he was all gung-ho about it... with the attitude of "if this country wasn't so ass-puckered..." (yes, those were his exact words). I can see his side of it too though. Society is still so stuck up today that anything that deviates from the "norm" is considered heinous and improper. Too many people still don't want to consider that there are different lifestyle choices and that we are all free to make whatever lifestyle choice we want.
However, I have a BIG problem with people flaunting their choices and being downright inconsiderate of other people. I have always been that way... ever since I can remember. It is my personal belief that you can be whoever you want to be and still have tact and respect for other people. I suppose part of it is my social worker side talking when I think about the impact an event like that can have on children and people who may have been abused. For goodness sakes, it's a place where families go and take their children. Yes, I think that parents have the duty to speak to their children about things like this and inform them about all the differences in the world, but at the same time, I don't think that people should flaunt their lifestyle differences in front of other people. There has to be give and take on BOTH sides... not just one side or the other.
It's like... I don't want to see a homosexual couple with their tongues down each others' throats in the middle of the mall just the same as I don't want to see a heterosexual couple with their tongues down each others; throats in the middle of the mall. I don't discriminate on the two-tongue-tango based on sexuality... it's all the same to me. Sorry, I do NOT want to see it in a public place. It's rude, inconsiderate, and just down right tacky. The event that occurred on Black Friday falls into the same category. Be tactful and respectful of others when you're in public. Period.
I even talked to my mom about it (who has similar lifestyle tastes lol), and she is in full agreement with me. There are some aspects of the BDSM lifestyle that you can take out into public... but black studded leashes and inappropriate dress is NOT one (or, really, two) of them.
So, I am going to open it up for all to speak their minds on the subject. Leave a comment and tell me what you think... and NO bashing others' opinions. We all have a right to have our own thoughts and peacefully speak our minds.
And now, I am going to bed to continually ponder this event (as I have been doing every day since last Friday...). lol
<3 Jade
It is my goal this month to post a new blog every day until Christmas. Why am I making this my goal, you may be asking yourself. Well, I've decided that I have been much happier since I started blogging (more regularly) again and getting all of my thoughts and feelings out of my head and into something tangible I can understand. Plus, it makes for a nice little countdown of the days until Christmas (which I look forward to every year... even though we're broke and really can't afford Christmas presents for anybody this year).
So, anywho... onto the topic of tonight's blog...
For those who don't know, I have a part-time job in retail. So, Black Friday being the biggest shopping day of the year, I had to work a 12 hour shift (3 a.m. until 3 p.m.) at my store. Well, I was at the jewelry counter, which just so happens to be right by the main door, when I see these people walk in that were stereotypically "gothed" out in their choice of clothes. The girls were in corset-style tops and extremely short, school-girl style plaid skirts (like, short enough to see their butt cheeks hanging out from the bottom of the skirts) and the guys were in baggy black pants with chains. But the most noticeable was the black studded leashes attached to the collars around the guys' necks that lead into the girls' hands (yes, we're talking the atypically seen male subs and female Dommes). The one guy had his hands handcuffed behind his back and then cuffed to the back belt loop of his pants. The other guy, although he had handcuffs around his wrist, had his hands free and hanging down by his side. Then, when they girls were paying for their stuff, the guys knelt on the floor by the register until they were done. Once the transaction was completed, the girls tugged on the leashes and said "Up. Come." and the guys did... and followed them out of the store.
Of course, this became a major hot-topic during the entire day of Black Friday among all of the employees. A lot of people thought it was done on a dare (because, really, there are people out there that would do something like that just in order to get a reaction out of people), but I can't see it being a dare because the couples were in their 30's-ish. If they had been 18-19 year olds, I could have seen it... but not at the age of 30 or so.
Personally, I don't give a flying fuck what type of lifestyle people want to live (duh). However, this event really disturbed a lot of people at work. A lot of my co-workers that are my age had the attitude of "live how you want, just don't bring it here," but a lot of the older ones were just downright disgusted by it. And honestly, I can see the point-of-view of both groups of people. After I was done working, I had a brief conversation with the man about this, and he was all gung-ho about it... with the attitude of "if this country wasn't so ass-puckered..." (yes, those were his exact words). I can see his side of it too though. Society is still so stuck up today that anything that deviates from the "norm" is considered heinous and improper. Too many people still don't want to consider that there are different lifestyle choices and that we are all free to make whatever lifestyle choice we want.
However, I have a BIG problem with people flaunting their choices and being downright inconsiderate of other people. I have always been that way... ever since I can remember. It is my personal belief that you can be whoever you want to be and still have tact and respect for other people. I suppose part of it is my social worker side talking when I think about the impact an event like that can have on children and people who may have been abused. For goodness sakes, it's a place where families go and take their children. Yes, I think that parents have the duty to speak to their children about things like this and inform them about all the differences in the world, but at the same time, I don't think that people should flaunt their lifestyle differences in front of other people. There has to be give and take on BOTH sides... not just one side or the other.
It's like... I don't want to see a homosexual couple with their tongues down each others' throats in the middle of the mall just the same as I don't want to see a heterosexual couple with their tongues down each others; throats in the middle of the mall. I don't discriminate on the two-tongue-tango based on sexuality... it's all the same to me. Sorry, I do NOT want to see it in a public place. It's rude, inconsiderate, and just down right tacky. The event that occurred on Black Friday falls into the same category. Be tactful and respectful of others when you're in public. Period.
I even talked to my mom about it (who has similar lifestyle tastes lol), and she is in full agreement with me. There are some aspects of the BDSM lifestyle that you can take out into public... but black studded leashes and inappropriate dress is NOT one (or, really, two) of them.
So, I am going to open it up for all to speak their minds on the subject. Leave a comment and tell me what you think... and NO bashing others' opinions. We all have a right to have our own thoughts and peacefully speak our minds.
And now, I am going to bed to continually ponder this event (as I have been doing every day since last Friday...). lol
<3 Jade
Sunday, November 28, 2010
Happy Thanksgiving
HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!
Yes, I know... I know... I know. I'm a few days late on posting this, but things here have been even more crazy than normal! My sisters came in Tuesday night and we (and by "we" I mean my dad, his fiance, my 2 sisters, the man, his son, and I- yes that makes 7 of us) went to see "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part I." And it was FANTASTIC! I'm definitely much more psyched about this movie than I was about number 6 (I was very disappointed in Half-blood Prince... it was not what I had expected it to be at all). Then, Wednesday, I went to work for 4 hours and then came home and cooked with my sister for 8 hours to prep for Thanksgiving dinner. On Thursday I woke up at the ass-crack of dawn and got myself, the man, his son, and my 2 sister's ready to visit my grandparents... then drove 2 hours to my grandparent's house, had Thanksgiving dinner, cleaned up, visited a little bit and then left and drove 2 hours back home. Once home, we unloaded and my sisters packed and took off took off to head back home... and I did my paperwork and packed for the weekend. When I finally went to bed, I ended up getting between 1 and 2 hours of sleep before waking up Friday morning and working Black Friday (3 a.m. to 3 a.m. woot... NOT). Then I drove home, finished packing, and we took off to visit the man's family in Maryland. I helped his mom with the kids (she had 4 of her grandsons there, including the man's son)... fed them and got them to bed. And finally got to pass out around 2 a.m. (they didn't go to sleep until well after midnight). Then I woke up Saturday morning fairly early and got myself ready to go get some grocery shopping done. The man and I went grocery shopping after his brother picked up his 2 sons... and then came home and I took about an hour nap. During this time, the man's cousin showed up with her daughter... I woke up and cooked dinner for all of us and then cleaned up. We played a few games (which was fun)... and then got the kid into bed around 11:30. I passed out somewhere between 12 and 12:30. Then I woke up this morning, packed our stuff, cleaned the room we sleep in, emptied the dishwasher, reloaded the dishwasher, and then helped load the car. I napped for about an hour on the way home... and then went and did an hour presentation on health insurance at my internship. After I got home from that, I finished tearing apart the turkey from Thanksgiving, warmed up leftover pasta for the kid so he could eat, and did my homework. Then my dad and his fiance showed up and we chatted for about 15 minutes or so... once they left I gave the kid a bath and now he's in bed (I'm hoping that he is already asleep because he was up late the past 2 nights and didn't really get to sleep in too late).
So, I hope everybody had a wonderful Thanksgiving. I'm now going to crawl into bed and pass out because tomorrow I am back to the daily grind.
<3 Jade
Yes, I know... I know... I know. I'm a few days late on posting this, but things here have been even more crazy than normal! My sisters came in Tuesday night and we (and by "we" I mean my dad, his fiance, my 2 sisters, the man, his son, and I- yes that makes 7 of us) went to see "Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part I." And it was FANTASTIC! I'm definitely much more psyched about this movie than I was about number 6 (I was very disappointed in Half-blood Prince... it was not what I had expected it to be at all). Then, Wednesday, I went to work for 4 hours and then came home and cooked with my sister for 8 hours to prep for Thanksgiving dinner. On Thursday I woke up at the ass-crack of dawn and got myself, the man, his son, and my 2 sister's ready to visit my grandparents... then drove 2 hours to my grandparent's house, had Thanksgiving dinner, cleaned up, visited a little bit and then left and drove 2 hours back home. Once home, we unloaded and my sisters packed and took off took off to head back home... and I did my paperwork and packed for the weekend. When I finally went to bed, I ended up getting between 1 and 2 hours of sleep before waking up Friday morning and working Black Friday (3 a.m. to 3 a.m. woot... NOT). Then I drove home, finished packing, and we took off to visit the man's family in Maryland. I helped his mom with the kids (she had 4 of her grandsons there, including the man's son)... fed them and got them to bed. And finally got to pass out around 2 a.m. (they didn't go to sleep until well after midnight). Then I woke up Saturday morning fairly early and got myself ready to go get some grocery shopping done. The man and I went grocery shopping after his brother picked up his 2 sons... and then came home and I took about an hour nap. During this time, the man's cousin showed up with her daughter... I woke up and cooked dinner for all of us and then cleaned up. We played a few games (which was fun)... and then got the kid into bed around 11:30. I passed out somewhere between 12 and 12:30. Then I woke up this morning, packed our stuff, cleaned the room we sleep in, emptied the dishwasher, reloaded the dishwasher, and then helped load the car. I napped for about an hour on the way home... and then went and did an hour presentation on health insurance at my internship. After I got home from that, I finished tearing apart the turkey from Thanksgiving, warmed up leftover pasta for the kid so he could eat, and did my homework. Then my dad and his fiance showed up and we chatted for about 15 minutes or so... once they left I gave the kid a bath and now he's in bed (I'm hoping that he is already asleep because he was up late the past 2 nights and didn't really get to sleep in too late).
So, I hope everybody had a wonderful Thanksgiving. I'm now going to crawl into bed and pass out because tomorrow I am back to the daily grind.
<3 Jade
Monday, November 22, 2010
A Strange Thought
I am so addicted to Eminem's song "Not Afraid." It's probably one of my top all-time favorite songs. To be completely honest, I've always been a bit of a fan of Eminem... his music got me through a lot when I was in high school. I wasn't a hard-core Eminem fan or anything... I just liked his music. It has a great beat and the lyrics are just really speak to me (even with all the cursing and anger behind them). But this song is so un-Eminem that I just can't over it. Instead of being negative and angry and whatever it's almost uplifting and positive.
I know... those are 2 words most people would never associate Eminem's music with... but for some reason, this song is really inspiring to me. I'm just tired of societal rules and having my life constantly conflict with what the world thinks I should be and do and say and whatever else. I just want to be ME. I'm tired of hiding behind the allure of professionalism and strict policies and regulations that have their constricting arms squeezing the life out of my little by little. I've felt like this almost all my life... like I need to break out and be who I was meant to be. But there's always something that has stopped me. There has always been something that has kept me from being who I really am.
It's frustrating to the n-th degree. I'm so conflicted. I don't want to let my family down, but at the same time, I don't want to let ME down. How do I make everybody happy? Really, I can't... and I know that. But I have to decide what's more important... making everybody else happy or making me happy.
I am stubborn. I am opinionated. I am rebellious. I am bratty. I am loud. I am obnoxious.
I like tattoos. I like piercings.
There's so much about me that I hold back. I've done little things... multiple piercings in my ears and one in my nose and 2 tattoos. But at the same time, every single time I get something else done, I get the looks from my family (well, my dad's side) that say "Hey, you're letting us down." and it makes me feel so guilty sometimes. I want to get more piercings. I want to get more tattoos. But I don't want to hurt anybody.
I'm being pulled in about 20 different directions.
Which way do I go?
I think I shall continue to listen to my song another 50 times and then go to bed. Another long-ish day tomorrow.
<3 Jade
I know... those are 2 words most people would never associate Eminem's music with... but for some reason, this song is really inspiring to me. I'm just tired of societal rules and having my life constantly conflict with what the world thinks I should be and do and say and whatever else. I just want to be ME. I'm tired of hiding behind the allure of professionalism and strict policies and regulations that have their constricting arms squeezing the life out of my little by little. I've felt like this almost all my life... like I need to break out and be who I was meant to be. But there's always something that has stopped me. There has always been something that has kept me from being who I really am.
It's frustrating to the n-th degree. I'm so conflicted. I don't want to let my family down, but at the same time, I don't want to let ME down. How do I make everybody happy? Really, I can't... and I know that. But I have to decide what's more important... making everybody else happy or making me happy.
I am stubborn. I am opinionated. I am rebellious. I am bratty. I am loud. I am obnoxious.
I like tattoos. I like piercings.
There's so much about me that I hold back. I've done little things... multiple piercings in my ears and one in my nose and 2 tattoos. But at the same time, every single time I get something else done, I get the looks from my family (well, my dad's side) that say "Hey, you're letting us down." and it makes me feel so guilty sometimes. I want to get more piercings. I want to get more tattoos. But I don't want to hurt anybody.
I'm being pulled in about 20 different directions.
Which way do I go?
I think I shall continue to listen to my song another 50 times and then go to bed. Another long-ish day tomorrow.
<3 Jade
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